The Quest for a New Body

It's never a good sign when you put on your workout clothes, and they're tight. This happened to me recently. There's nothing worse than gym pants that are supposed to be a little baggy, and they're skin tight. It's a bad feeling, and I felt really uncomfortable being seen in public. I thought about skipping the gym until I had a decent pair of workout pants, but I had a pre-scheduled health evaluation. I had to go with my bad pants. I had to keep pulling them down to prevent the dreaded camel toe because nobody should have to be witness to the camel toe. So right around 4:45, I head down to my health evaluation. The guy at the front desk takes my heart rate, my blood pressure; all are normal. Then, he puts me on the scale. I almost fainted when he told me how much I weighed. I have never thought of myself as a heavy person, but when I heard the numbers come out of his mouth, I realized I was a big tubbo. Had I been in denial for months? Didn't I notice my pants and shirts were a little tighter than usual? Yes, I was in denial. I think since I don't own a full length mirror right now, I could just hide in my little fantasy world of still having a good body. I'm a good 20 lbs overweight right now, and I'm not happy with my body; I just don't feel like myself anymore. It's a bad feeling. I blame it on many things: stress over the past few months, the holidays, and getting a little too comfortable in my relationship.

So, now I am on the quest for a new body, a better body, a healthier body, and a sexier body. I am committed to working out, eating well, and not feeling sorry for myself anymore. I'm fat, and I've accepted it. After that dreadful day of my skin tight pants, the camel toe, and the weigh-in, I went out and bought a pair of really baggy workout pants. They're HUGE, but they're comfortable, and I feel good in them. I feel like it's a good start. I know this physical journey will take some patience and a lot of effort, but I'm taking everything one step on the Stairmaster at a time.