When Love Makes You Miserable

For a few months I was in love with somebody. I'm not sure why, or if I was really in love with that person, or if he was even the person I thought he was. Now that I've stepped back from this situation, I realize that I didn't know him at all. He didn't want me to know him.

He played games, he kept me at arm's length at all times, and he had never stopped loving his ex. Needless to say, I was miserable. I had so much love to give, and yet he wasn't the one to give it to. He didn't deserve it anyway.

The last time I saw him, he mistreated me, and it broke my heart, because I had always been so good to him when he was at his lowest point. Sometimes loving somebody hurts, and I stopped loving him to finally make the pain go away. And it did.

Model Featured: Tom Stapledon

I'm Back, Bitches

Yikes, it's been a while since I've posted. The last four months have been anything but enjoyable for me. I got caught up in a bad situation involving a guy I really liked, and I will definitely write about it soon. I'm out of it now and stronger than ever. I'm going to chalk it up to another learning experience. I should've known better, and I should've never got involved knowing the situation, but I did. Sometimes you can't see the forest through the trees.

Anyway I'm glad to be back, and I promise to start posting more. I have a lot to say. These past few months have taught me some very hard lessons. It's a new day, and I'm feeling good: out of the darkness and into the light.

Let Them Eat cake.

There's a new cake shop in Lexington, MA called "cake." They feature a line of delicious cupcakes and beautifully crafted dessert and specialty cakes. The menu features a chocolate lover's dream cake, "Midnight Delight", a dense fudge cake filled with chocolate pastry cream topped with a generous dollop of chocolate buttercream icing; a sweet vanilla bean cake filled with rich pastry cream and topped with Ghiradelli chocolate ganache, "Black Tie Affair", a southern red velvet cake topped with a luscious cream cheese icing, "Red Carpet", along with several other tempting flavors.


Check out Cave Cibum's review for Cake in Lexington, MA.

Also, check out The Cupcakes Blog

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Bad Advice

Lately, I've been checking out some online advice sites/forums, where women discuss their love issues. I'm blown away by some of the negativity and coldness of some of this advice other women give each other. There are a lot of inane "he's just not that into you" statements, which is fine if you're Greg Behrendt and you're saying this four years ago, but this is 2009: can we please come up with another catchphrase? Please!

These women come online because they're in stressful situations with the guys they like, and yet, the other women on the site are completely insensitive and make nasty, judgmental statements. My mom always taught me that there is a way to say everything in a nice way. I'm really sick of reading various women's questions and the non-thinking, trite answers that soon follow.

I've been giving advice for years, whether it's been to friends, co-workers, family, etc, and I can tell you the moment you start saying "You know what you should do," then you're already doing it wrong. People ask for advice because they don't know what to do; they have turned it over in their minds over and over, and by asking you for an opinion, they are showing you that they really need help.

So, why make them feel bad about themselves? Why turn condescending on them, or act as if you are judging them? Be their friend, listen to what they have to say, and most importantly, be gentle with their feelings.

I read these websites, and I'm horrified by the brutal "tough love" approach taken by these women: women, who I might add, have probably made the same mistakes, have been heartbroken, cheated on, or are in horrible relationships. And yet, they act as if they are better than everybody. "He's just not that into you!", they exclaim. Dump him and move on. Ok, great advice. However, never once do people take into account on how hard that can be sometimes.

A woman who is in love with a man or living with a man cannot just dump him and move on without really tearing apart her life, not to mention her heart and soul. So, why be so harsh?? Isn't there a way of saying these things without being so insensitive and cruel? The whole point of giving advice to somebody is to make them feel better, not worse. I'm really disgusted by these despicable, heartless bitches who don't understand that.

If You Don't Log Into Facebook Everyday...

Lately, I've been checking out some relationship advice forums, and one of the things I've noticed is that women will blame a guy not logging into Facebook for one or (gasp!) two days on "he must be going through something". Umm, maybe he's busy, or maybe he found something better to do than update his Facebook status, or maybe he knows you're a psychopath who's cyberstalking his every move online.

Why Is It?

Why is it I only get texts from a guy that I want nothing to do with? I don't want to see him, hang out with him, talk to him, etc., and yet, he won't get the hint. It's been two months now, since we had our first and only date. Leave me alone. Stop texting me. Stop asking me about the guy whom I told you I was seeing (to get you off my back). We're not friends, so move on. I'm just not that into you.

This guy never gives up, and it's really getting on my nerves. I deleted him from my Facebook, and then the fool tried requesting me again. Who does that?! And, then every couple of weeks, I get some asinine text from him. It's starting to piss me off. I think if he texts me again, I'm going to tell him off.

I don't mind being single. It's not the best, but it's tolerable. But for the love of all that is holy, please make this idiot go away. The last text he sent me, I ignored. I've been ignored a million times by guys. This is my way of paying it forward, I guess, ha.

Worse

What's worse than having to deal with your friend's cheesy, gag-worthy hourly status updates about how great her new boyfriend is on Facebook?

Answer: Being subjected to her equally annoying boyfriend's status updates on how amazing his girlfriend is.

Seriously. Knock it off.