Quote of the Day: Miss(ed) Manners

About two or three years back I ran into a client of ours after an event. I assumed she’d want to shake hands over a job well done, but she went in for the hug and kiss. I punched her right in the crotch with my extended hand. How is that a greeting? I think in some places it might be, but crotch-punching never really caught on in the States.

(Via Miss(ed) Manners)

The Amicable Break Up

"It was amicable. If by 'amicable', one means she solely alternates between weeping and blind rage." - One of my best friends, explaining his recent break up.

Quote of the Day: Love Bytes

“Jon has told me a million times he loves me and wants to marry me...A friend asked if we have a new date set, and I said, ‘Absolutely not. We are taking it easy this time.’ I still believe that he is my fairy tale. I will get what I want.” - Ana Maria Macedo, the woman who was jilted by her fiance after planning her dream wedding (Via Page Six Magazine)

Something about this quote makes me think Jon made the best decision of his life.

Quote of the Day: George Carlin

“The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating...

...and you finish off as an orgasm.”

George Carlin, you will be missed.

Quote of the Day: David Bianculli

"If you lose on 'The Bachelor,' you become The Bachelorette," he continued. "It's like a hydra — you cut off one head and two more take its place."

- David Bianculli, TV critic for NPR's Fresh Air and tvworthwatching.com commenting on reality TV today.