The Village is Missing Its Idiot

The Real Housewives of Orange County season finale was cray cray! I thought the whole season has been incredibly boring. I would try watching an episode, and 20 minutes in, I would zone out. There were episodes I would try watching again, and still couldn't make it through all the way. This season was TV Ambien.

This episode was drama-filled, ridiculous, full of unnecessary fighting, and some idiot got kicked out of a party for eating a bow off the hosts' (Terry and Heather Dubrow) cake and then being a total asshole about it (Who does that?!). As Tamra commented in reference to "bowgate", the village is missing its idiot. And in this case, the idiot is a mentally unhinged lush.

The best parts of this episode were:
Gretchen giving Tamra one of the cheesiest friendship gifts I've ever seen in my life. "Here is a tacky charm bracelet.You are unbreakable." Super ghey! They've only been friends for 5 months! I can't wait to tell my best friend, Tara, that she's unbreakable, so she can laugh in my face.

Sarah getting kicked out. I'm shocked that Heather put up with her shit as long as she did. I'm sorry, but if you eat the bow off my cake, you need to get the fuck out of my house. It's my party, and I'll kick you out if I want to. The fact that Slade, who was channeling the legendary Hollywood producer, Robert Evans, clad in black from head-to-toe, had to play the bouncer and tell Sarah and Alexis they needed to go was even more hilarious. 

The previous episode where Sara brazenly eats the BOW.

Jim Bellino showing up, looking like he had busted out of a wedding party. I couldn't tell if he looked like a banquet waiter or a groomsman. Jim, WTF were you wearing? Nice shiny vest with a tacky print. Somewhere a Vegas blackjack dealer is missing a vest. I love that he came to the party just so he could stand up for his wife, dumb-dumb Alexis', honor. You know it killed him to see how somebody with real money lives. Unlike Jim's cheesy home that was bought under his business, The Dubrows' house is a mansion, not your standard Real Housewives large home either, it's a frigging palatial mansion overlooking the water. RIDICULOUS. Go Terry!

Vicky screaming at Tamra at the top of her lungs "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FRIEND. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY SOULMATE, MY FRIEND, MY SISTER." Vicky is insane. I think she legitimately needs medication. Xanax is YOUR friend, Vicky.

According to Watch What Happens Live, "EVIL EYE" was uttered 29 times. Brooks, with a set of new teeth bankrolled by Vicky, called out Tamra for rolling her eyes at Vicky. Rolling your eyes is not the same as "the evil eye", but Brooks is a moron. And according to Briana, he has no car (whhhhhaaaaaaaaaat), no home, and no checking account of his own. If you open up the dictionary, you will see his picture under the word: MOOCH. There is no way he bought her a mink. This did not happen, regardless of what Vicky wants people to believe.


What did everybody think of tonight's finale?